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Sound of the Crowd was a late night entertainment show on E4 aimed at the “yoof” demographic where the studio audience would vote and decide on various parts of the show. One of the strands on the show was called “Gunge or Glory”. The premise of Gunge or Glory was that two performers would go head-to-head against each other and the audience decide who they want to save from getting a thorough gunging.
The set of Sound of the crowd has a very shiny black floor, bright red studio lights and a studio audience of about 200 people.
The presenter, Alex Delaney – a prototypical squeaky voiced mop-headed 20 something in a red checked shirt, skinny jeans and trendy white trainers addresses the studio audience after a segment of the show where the audience has just voted that a grown man should eat a worm sandwich, as you could imagine Sound of the Crowd is a show desperate to shock and offend. But often just comes across as desperate.
“Now we come to the part of the show where you get to decide the fate of someone’s dignity – That’s right – it’s time for GUNGE OR GLORY! Now let’s bring out our contestants. Please welcome Adam Armstrong and Luisa Omielan”
Both contestants walk out Adam Armstrong must be about 26 and is dressed in a bola hat covering his long blonde hair and a waistcoat and skinny jeans combo and he is very handsome and chiseled with designer stubble. Luisa is wearing leopard print tights and a black belly top exposing her curvy midriff and she is wearing blue eyeshadow.
“So we’ve seen this before, but for those of you who don’t know these two are about to perform for you and when they a finished you are going to vote for who you want to SAVE from getting the gunging of a lifetime in our dreaded gunge car wash.”
The camera zooms in on the car wash and it is very similar to the Noel’s House Party car wash, but the chair which the losing recipient sits on is a toilet presumably in order to make it more humiliating.
“Ladies and gentleman please welcome Adam Armstrong”
Adam Armstrong is a singer-songwriter who probably thinks as himself as a one of a kind musical messiah when actually his music sounds almost exactly the same as all the other piano singer-songwriters that are played through the airwaves of Radio 1 such as Tom Odell and James Bay and is enjoyed by the aforementioned “yoof” demographic. He does however play his song “Concrete River” with much sincerity and heart – almost as if he forgot that he was on a vulgar late-night E4 show and believed him self to be performing for royalty at the Royal Albert Hall or in front of thousands at the O2 Arena instead of 200 disinterested young people who applied for a free ticket to a television recording. He finishes his song and the audience applaud wildly.
The camera diverts the attention back to Alex who introduces Luisa.
“Now, the lady who wants to convince you to keep her clean; It’s Luisa Omielan”
Luisa Omielan is quite a confident stand-up comedian and seems quite aware of her attractiveness. Her long dyed blonde hair is shoulder length and is wearing blue eye shadow to complement her attractive face. Her routine is almost exactly identical to the one in this video
She addresses the audience as “Ladies” and “bitches” a lot as in “Am I right bitches?”and she almost swaggers round the studio floor part of her routine is to strip off and expose that sexy curvy body which she does and not only does she pull her tights down, but she actually takes her top of as well showing her fairly impressive breasts only covered by a black bra and her lower half by a pair of black knickers.
The audience laughs throughout her performance and applauds as she finishes.
The camera focuses on Alex again as he stands in front of the gunge car wash.
“Now it’s time for the moment of truth! Who do you want to save from the gunge?”
We then see Adam and Luisa standing next to each other. Adam looks like he just doesn’t care what happens and Luisa who is still only wearing a black bra and knickers puts her hands close to her face and smiles nervously.
“To save Adam press A and to save Luisa press B”
The audience is shown pressing some handsets.
Alex reveals the results.
“Well, I can reveal that 86% of our studio audience has voted to save Adam meaning it’s a landslide and Luisa is going to be gunged”
Luisa then puts her hands over her mouth the squeals and giggles.
The results shouldn’t be too surprising. Who were they going to save the chiseled sincere singer-song-writer who performs the sort of populist BBC Radio 1 pap that people seem to eat up or the overly-confident and cocky comedian who only seemed like the perfect fit for a gunging?
“Oh my days bitches, why would you do this to this to me?” laughs Luisa
Alex then takes her by the arm and sits her down on the car wash toilet. Luisa looks vulnerable, but sexy. Her insanely hot body shines under the studio lights and she laughs and looks rather cute while doing so.
“So Luisa, how are you feeling right about now?” asks Alex
“Oh my god! I’m gonna get gunged” Luisa says in a rather high pitched tone.
“To be honest with you though I think I’ve been covered in more gunge than this in the bedroom. Do you hear me ladies?”
The Audience erupts in laughter again at her heavily implied cum joke.
“Well there’s nothing left to do then to show Luisa the gunge”
Alex then pulls a lever and the car wash seat turns around and jaunts forward. Luisa then goes through the big car wash brushes messing up some of that lovely wavy died blonde hair. Luisa then shows of her dimples with a sexy laugh and then she pulls a rather cocky face embracing what is about to happen – she pulls this face for about two seconds until a heavy stream of thick bright pink opaque gunge splashes down causing the umbrella effect over Luisa. We hear the most bellowing “AAGGHHHH!” as this happens. We could not see Luisa she was no longer a semi-nude clean woman she reduced to a glossy dome of hot pink gunge and it almost looks still until Luisa puts her hands under the dome of gunge which streams though her fingers. She then makes the mistake of trying to wipe her face and of course this just means that she smears pink gunge all over her pretty and adorable face covering her forehead, cheeks and nose and you can see her laughing with joy and elation as this happens. You can see that her sexy shoulders and arms are also completely covered in pink gunk. Another gunge dome forms, but it ends after Luisa slicks her gunge coated hair back and this then causes the gunge to turn to a stream and then run right down her face enveloping it completely to the point where the only recognizably feature on her face is the bump of her nose. She the tries to wipe the gunge from her eyes but it keeps streaming. The gunge then streams down into her boobs and down to her sexy slightly chubby belly covering them both fully in gunge and then stops and Luisa’s chair is bought forward and turns around and to face the audience. Her sexy body is almost completely covered in gunge including those legs – her almost bare lap is a pit of pink gunge meaning her thighs are completely coated. She then wipes her face and laughs. She then sexually rubs the gunge into her almost nude frame smearing it in all over her breasts, belly and legs and them blows a gungey kiss to the camera. To most – this is a bikini clad woman smearing a paint-like substance all over her self, but to anyone even remotely interested in WAM – it’s borderline pornographic and trilling to watch!
Alex then walks over to her with a microphone.
“So how was that Luisa? Do you feel like Beyonce now?”
Luisa then gives a high pitched laugh while slicking her hair back tightly – her forehead and cheeks are fully coated and there is a blob of pink on her nose.
“I think I still look stunning bitches. Am I right?”
The audience applauds and agrees with her.
Alex then turns smug.
“Now Luisa I do have a confession”
Luisa looks nervously intrigued.
“Were not actually finished yet…would you like to see Luisa get gunged again”
Luisa becomes genuinely terrified.
“No no no oh no please I’m already a mess!”
“If you want to see Luisa gunged again press A if you don’t press B”
The audience are once again seen voting.
Well the results are in and I can reveal the 100% would like to see you get gunged again?
Luisa then screams “No please no!”
It’s become obvious that Luisa genuinely has no idea that there would be more gunge being dropped on top of her.
The gunge is then realized once again and this time the gunge is pure white and is thick and once again forms a dome, but this time the dome isn’t still and dances around rippling and spinning all over the beautiful and funny victim and as she had already slicked her hair back the dome stops and becomes a stream once again plastering her face. She then tries to rub the gunge off her cheeks revealing the tanned skin on the face, but it just keeps getting covered again. She then gasps for air and then the gunge continues to stream once again making the bump on her nose the only recognisable part of her face. The goo once again streams down onto her breasts and chest and on to her lap and this time she rubs the gunge into herself in a undeniably sexual fashion while it is still falling on her allowing it to cover her face. The gunging then slowly stops. She then slicks her hair back tightly behind her and laughs it off as she wipes her face down with her blue eye shadow mixing with the gunk.
Alex then returns.
“How was that Luisa?”
“Well now I feel more like Friday night with my boyfriend. Am I right bitches?” she says referencing the white stuff all over her.
You can see that her whole body is coated with white and pink and that some of it has mixed together creating a lighter shade of pink.
Alex then begins the next segment of the show and walks away from Luisa.
It was an odd feeling for Luisa as she sat under the lights covered in gunge as despite her rather erratic stand up routine she had never been humiliated like this before, but she did clearly enjoy herself and liked the feeling of the thick gunge and embraced her national humiliation unlike many others, but it was still the most humiliating moment of her life and everyone that she knew was going to see this at some point.
A stage hand then walks over to her to take her to the shower where she can think about the whole ordeal just a bit better.