The Gunge Grand Prix 2013 – Round 1 Part 1

And so, The first part of the first round is all set up and ready to go. Below you shall find the list of votes that you shall be making in this round. The pages go live Saturday Morning, and you will have roughly 48 hours to make your vote, with polls closing Sunday evening/Monday morning/Whenever I get round to it. Any editor will be able to view the pages though, and they can look through to see if there are any mistakes (notably wrong picture, or wrong link).

And of course, good luck to all the women who probably have no idea what’s going on.

1. Wendy Hurrell vs. Becki Newton
2. Katie Price vs. Olivia Phyland
3. Helen Glover vs. Zoe Salmon
4. Lee McKenzie vs. Debra Stephenson
5. Padma Lakshmi vs. Erin Simpson
6. Lana del Rey vs. Georgia Moffett
7. Christina Perri vs. Joanna ‘JoJo’ Levesque
8. Brie Bella vs. Stacy Keibler
9. Sammy Winward vs. Stana Katic
10. Amber Tamblyn vs. Ellen Page
11. Natalie Pinkham vs. Hayley Williams
12. Jessica Ennis vs. Jenna McDougall
13. Jordy Lucas vs. Pippa Middleton
14. Melanie Sykes vs. Mollie King
15. Louisa Lytton vs. Amy Lee
16. Pink vs. Margarita Levieva
17. Alyson Hannigan vs. Brooklyn Decker
18. Rachel McAdams vs. Susanna Reid
19. Jennifer Stone vs. Orianthi Panagaris
20. Angelina Jolie vs. Phoebe Tonkin
21. Kristen Randall vs. Gemma Smallpage
22. Amber Heard vs. Vanessa Lachey
23. Sally Nugent vs. Jacqueline Jossa
24. Sally Bercow vs. Layla
25. Amelia Bullmore vs. Kristen Stewart
26. Clemence Poesy vs. Jayma Mays
27. Jennifer Morrison vs. Dakota Fanning
28. Victoria Pendleton vs. Mrs Tessmacher
29. Kelly Brook vs. Uma Thurman
30. Charlie Webster vs. Indiana Evans
31. Kate Middleton vs. Jorgie Porter
32. Rachel Riley vs. Stephanie Ashworth
33. Nathalia Ramos vs. Alissa White-Gluz
34. Sienna Miller vs. Hannah Spearritt
35. Gillian Jacobs vs. Emeli Sande
36. Alésia Glidewell vs. Lilah Parsons
37. Lauren Laverne vs. Georgia King
38. Ashley Benson vs. Amanda Holden
39. Taylor Jardine vs. Laura Tobin
40. Kat Dennings vs. Parker Posey
41. Anneka Rice vs. Ashleigh Brewer
42. Amy Adams vs. Kylie Minogue
43. Lucy Verasamy vs. Kimberley Nixon
44. Natalie Dormer vs. Caroline Langrishe
45. Kaley Cuoco vs. Michaela Strachan
46. Taeler Hendrix vs. Fergie
47. Lois Cernyw vs. Hannah Simone
48. Coleen Rooney vs. Louise Brealey
49. Catherine Tyldesley vs. Federica Nargi
50. Kristen Bell vs. Florence Welch
51. Anna Popplewell vs. Zoe Saldana
52. Vanessa White vs. Naya Rivera
53. Amberley Lobo vs. Bridgit Mendler
54. Jenna Louise Coleman vs. Sophie Dahl
55. Amelia Lily vs. Rihanna
56. Danielle Bux vs. Chibi
57. Ashley Argota vs. Lucy Porter
58. Nell McAndrew vs. Alexis Bledel
59. Tara (Victoria) vs. Hayden Panettiere
60. Liz McLarnon vs. Emilia Fox
61. Nicola Peltz vs. Rita Pereira
62. Sally Bretton vs. Kristin Kreuk
63. Gemma Atkinson vs. Aisling Loftus
64. Claire Sweeney vs. Diana Vickers
65. Sally Magnusson vs. Lauren Harris
66. Brooke Vincent vs. Perrie Edwards
67. Chase Masterson vs. Adele
68. Anna Gunn vs. Rachel Weisz
69. Anthea Turner vs. Courtney Ford
70. Erika Eleniak vs. Lisa Foiles
71. Pollyanna Woodward vs. Natalie Sawyer
72. Nina Dobrev vs. Daniella Monet
73. Jessica Taylor vs. Blake Lively
74. Lady Gaga vs. Lucy Liu
75. Brenda Song vs. Myleene Klass
76. Pamela Großer vs. Allison Scagliotti
77. Jameela Jamil vs. Costanza Caracciolo
78. Charlotte Jackson vs. Lita
79. Jennifer Ryan vs. Caroline Wozniacki
80. Mary Elizabeth Winstead vs. Nixie Pixel
81. Maggie Grace vs. Brighton Hertford
82. Riki Lindhome vs. Olivia Wilde
83. Michelle Hunziker vs. Tina O’Brien
84. Shailene Woodley vs. Kirsten Dunst
85. Erica Durance vs. Marla Sokoloff
86. Michelle Keegan vs. Aliona Vilani

Pages will be live SATURDAY!!!!!

You Bet Your Own Back- Episode 2.4 – Update

Disclaimer: Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.

 

Emma Crosby walked back onto the stage.

 

 

 

“Hello everyone and welcome back to the You Bet Your Own Back Wipeout special, all four of the ladies competing for your votes this evening are doing so related to their appearances on either the American or British version of the show and their immediate futures are in your hands.”

 

The crowd responds to this with cheering.

 

“So shall we invite them back out, first up we have our American pair, and of those our gambler is Vanessa Minnillo.”

 

 

 

 

“Welcome back Vanessa very soon I will be asking for the level of gunging that you intend inflicting on Jill, but first, how do you imagine the voting is going?” asks Emma.

 

“Well Emma, I think that having heard Amanda’s complaint against Ellie, and when I compare that against why I am here today, I am certain that the vast majority of people will vote for me to get my revenge on Jill,” says Vanessa.

 

“You sound confident Vanessa, but will you be confident enough to go for a level 3 gunging, we shall see very shortly, I wonder if Jill is as confident that you are wrong as you are that you are right, let’s bring her back out and find out.”

 

  

 

“Jill, we have heard how confident Vanessa is that she will be having her revenge, surely that means that you will be getting messy?”

 

“No Emma, it only means that she is more of a fool then I took her for, after all it’s a 50/50 chance that one of us will be gunged, so while I think that I have enough fans out there to avoid a gunging, I am not going to say that I definitely will,” says Jill.

 

“So Jill thinks that there are enough fans of hers out there to save her, and someone who hopes that she is right is Amanda Byram because that would mean that she would be having her revenge on Ellie.”

 

 

 

“Emma, I think that the double of Ellie and Vanessa getting gunged will prove to be much more popular and I am confident that I will get my own back on Ellie,” says Amanda.

 

“Well Amanda, we will get to see very soon how confident you are when I ask you for your gamble level, but before I do, I wonder how Ellie feels the voting is going?”

 

 

 

 

“Emma, I think that I will be safe, I think that Vanessa has a much better reason for seeking revenge than Amanda, and I think that Jill would prove to be much more popular than I am, so I am very confident I will be safe, in fact I hope that Amanda goes for the highest level possible so that she will suffer as much as possible at my hands for bringing me here,” says Ellie.

 

“Wow, Ellie certainly sounds confident, she seems to be daring Amanda to go for the highest level possible, but is that reverse psychology and will it work, we shall see soon as it is time for our gamblers to announce what level they wish to go for, but first I have some information that might impact on their choices.  You see we couldn’t have a Wipeout special and not have a muddy and a wet forfeit, so the final pools for two of you ladies will be md and one of the buckets will contain water, which I am told will be very cold.  This means that should you choose a level 1 forfeit, you will have no choice with your gunge, whereas a level 3 will give you two choices.  As always at level 3 there will be the additional of having you losing lady suffering her forfeits in her underwear.  I hope that is all clear, it’s really not all that difficult, so first up its Vanessa, what level do you choose for Jill remembering that you will have to suffer at the same level if you do not win the vote.”

 

“Emma, I was going to go for a level 2, but having seen Jill’s back, I think it’s clear of all to see that she is not wearing a bra, so if I go for level 3 she will suffer a topless gunging whereas I am only in danger of getting gunged in my underwear and I think the risk is worth it, after all I am going to win.”

“Thank you Vanessa, Jill could you please turn around so we can get an idea of what Vanessa is talking about.”

 

 

 

“I think Vanessa is right, but now it’s time for Amanda to choose her level, so Amanda what’s it going to be?”

 

“Emma, I think that going for a lower level than Vanessa would mean I would lose votes, so I too go for a level 3 gunging, and I am sure that Ellie will be in the chair in her underwear.”

 

“Thank you Amanda, so 2 level 3’s will be coming up, but who will be suffering these, well that’s up to you, but to give everyone an idea of who might be getting messy I will let you know how the voting is going to date.  I can tell you that very early on one lady took a lead and has never looked back, in fact she has collected almost 72% of the 114 votes collected to date, and that lady is Amanda.”

 

Amanda cheers in delight and is quickly joined by Jill when she realises what Emma’s announcement means.

 

“So Amanda, it looks like the public think that you have a good case, you must be happy?” asks Emma.

 

“I am Emma, but I would be happier if this is the final result, so everyone please keep voting for me to gunge Ellie, and don’t forget, she will be in her underwear when I do it.”

 

“And Jill, not only are you avoiding a gunging, but you will get to take immediate revenge on Vanessa for bringing you here in the first place.”

 

“I know, it’s great, given that Vanessa was trying to gunge me topless, I will take great pleasure in getting her very messy, so I want everyone out there to keep voting for me, and I will ensure that you get what you are looking for,” says Jill.

 

“Not too long ago Ellie was daring Amanda to go for a level 3 gunging, now she has got her wish and it looks like it could backfire on her, how does that make you feel?”

 

“I’m extremely surprised, but there are only 114 votes cast, so that means that even though the percentage looks very bad, there are only 50 votes between us, so it could still turnaround significantly,” says Ellie who sounds less confident then her words would suggest she is.

 

“And finally, Vanessa, you came here to get revenge on Jill, but it looks like you will be getting messy at her hands, and it is all your own fault, how does that make you feel?”

 

“Emma, I will not lie, I am surprised that the voting has gone the way it has, but I still think I have the better case, and I also think that Jill will have to suffer her forfeit topless will have a major impact on the voting, so I still think that Jill will be in that chair and not me.”

 

“We shall see, as these 4 ladies have nothing left to say to influence you, it’s all up to you now, please keep voting and we shall see you in the final part of the show,” says Emma.

 

 

Gunge Nation Emmerdale Cast

Disclaimer: Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.

There hasn’t been a story been written in a while, especially a celebrity one so here I go I am going to write one.

“Welcome to another gunge nation with me your host Ryan Priddle and on tonight’s show we have a bevy of beauty’s from the soap Emmerdale, so let introduce them one by one shall we, the top 7 will receive a naked gunging and the 7 with the least amount of votes will get to stay clothed and gunge the other 7, first up is Sammy Winward”.

“So Sammy how do you think you will fare in the vote”.

“Well Ryan having already been gunged I think I will escape the gunge”.

“Thanks Sammy, now time to meet our second lady and that lady is Isabel Hodgins”.

“So Isabel how are you feeling about a potential naked gunging”.

“Well Ryan I am not entirely thrilled about it, I just hope the public shows some mercy and I manage to escape”.

“Thanks Isobel, now lets meet our third lady and that lady is Natalie J Robb”.

“So Natalie your thought please”.

“Well Ryan having a relationship with the bad boy in the soap means i could be in a lot of trouble here but I certainly hope that is not the case”.

“Thanks Natalie, now time to meet our fourth lady Charley Webb”.

“So Charley how do you feel”.

“Well Ryan having already once been fictionally gunged on this site I hope I will be spared but I feel the public will like to see me publicly humiliated due to the character I play”.

“Thanks Charley now let’s move onto our lovely fifth lady, who is Lucy Pargeter”.

“So Lucy how are you feeling”.

“Well Ryan being one of the older ladies on the show I hope the voting public will have mercy on me, but due to what I have done on the soap I fear the worse”.

“Thanks Lucy, now time to meet lovely lady number six Chelsea Halfpenny”.

“So Chelsea do you think you will escape”.

“Yes Ryan I do feel, that I will escape with my dignity intact”.

“Thanks Chelsea, now onto number 7 Fiona Wade”.

“So Fiona your thoughts please”.

“Well Ryan I think the public will be kind to me and allow me to keep my dignity”.

“Thanks Fiona, now we are into the second half of ladies and number 8 is Zoe Henry”.

“Zoe your thought’s”.

“Like Lucy said being one of the older ladies will hopefully mean I will be able to get away clean”.

“Thanks Zoe, now onto lady number nine Charlotte Bellamy”.

“

“Charlotte your thoughts please”.

“I just don’t want to get messy and certainly don’t want to take my clothes off”.

“Thanks Charlotte now onto lady number 10 who is Sian Reese-Williams”.

“Sian your thought’s please”.

“Well Ryan being one of the character’s that has never really got into trouble or done anything really nasty i think I will escape”.

“Thanks Sian onto lady 11 Emma Atkins”.

“Emma your thought’s please”.

“Well Ryan being a bitch through out my years on Emmerdale, I am a bit worried that I could be in serious trouble of getting a naked gunging”.

“Thanks Emma now onto lady number 12 who is Natalie Anderson”.

“Natalie your thought’s well Ryan having already escaped one fictional gunging at your hands and doing time in Emmerdale I think I could be in real danger here and I don’t really want to be”.

“Thanks Natalie onto the  lady who is number thirteen and she is Nicola Wheeler”.

“Nicola your thought’s please”

“Well Ryan I think I will escape as the other ladies will just get more votes than me”.

“Thanks Nicola now onto our fourteenth which is Gaynor Faye”.

“So Gaynor your thoughts”.

“Well Ryan I think I will manage to escape the mess”.

“Thanks Gaynor, now onto our penultimate lady and number fifteen and that is Gemma Oaten”.

“Gemma your thoughts please”.

“Well Ryan I am just hoping to escape but with my recent story-lines I can’t see it happening”.

Thanks Gemma and onto our final lady number 16 Michelle Hardwick who if you didn’t know plays vet Vanessa Woodfield”.

“Michelle your thoughts please”.

“Well Ryan being new and not many people knowing me I should be able to escape your mess”.

“Thanks Michelle”.

“There you have it 16 ladies from Emmerdale only 8 can get the naked gunging you decide who”.

The results will be written one day next week when i know when I am and not working so I have a free day to write the story.

AKBingo! – New improved pie cannon

Thanks to the Messy Scenes blog and Wam Jake. As promised, the pie cannon returns, and its performance has been tweaked (the coverage is more thorough in area, but also thinner, I would say). On the receiving end are Aika Ōta (多田 愛佳), Yuki Kashiwagi (柏木 由紀) Haruka Katayama (片山 陽加), and quizmaster Mayu Watanabe (渡辺 麻友). Sadly, the best shot was taken by Karen Iwata (岩田 華怜), but because she is 15 (most likely 14 at time of filming) I can’t include it here.

A Request for Requests

I’ve written a few different things on here so far.  I get a kick out of writing them, and folks seem to enjoy them as well, so I plan to continue.

My problem is, I’ve got a handful of ideas, but no particular favorite.  So I’m going to see if I can’t make a poll and open up the decision to a vote.  Other suggestions not listed are welcome as well.  Regardless of the outcome, time permitting, I’ll start in on something new soon.  Thanks.

Music Monday: Slayer

I almost considered canning this one because of what happened eleven days ago – Slayer’s lead guitarist Jeff Hanneman passed away due to liver cirrhosis. While it was a pretty disheartening event for a metal fan like myself, I’ve tried not to let it get to me too much. I never really know what to say about such events anyway.

Anyway, Slayer. One of the “Big Four of Thrash Metal” along with Anthrax, Megadeth and Metallica and generally the heaviest of the three. They’ve made some pretty good music (by my tastes anyway) over the years, but aren’t my favourite of the Big Four (that’s Anthrax).

Pineapple Dance Studios is a dance studio complex (big shock, I know) based in London, and subject of a docusoap back in 2010 called… well, Pineapple Dance Studios. It was on Sky which I didn’t have at the time, so I didn’t see it apart from the bits Harry Hill lampooned on TV Burp. I doubt I would have seen it even if I did have Sky though, apart from maybe out of a sense of morbid curiosity.

The two crossed over in episode 4 of the TV show, wherein some of their dancers performed in treacle for Slayer’s single “Beauty Through Order”. I’m sure the show can explain it better than I can.

And the end result? Through this link. No YT embed since it doesn’t seem to even exist on YT.